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Why does it happen?

Why do I feel like I have less confidence?

You might suddenly feel less confident because of something big happening in your life, like a relationship ending or someone you love dying. Or it could be due to lots of ‘smaller’ things happening one after another, like being bullied, getting ill or exam pressure.

You are not alone in your feelings. Almost everybody has feelings of low confidence at sometime or another.

If you have problems with low confidence for a long time, it can make you unhappy, and stop you doing the things you want to do. You don’t have to put up with it. There are ways to get help:

  • Talk to somebody that you trust about how you are feeling
  • If you are in contact with a local support service then speak with your support worker
  • Talk to a counsellor free via Childline on 0800 1111, through online chat or email

Top tips for growing self-confidence

People illustration

Talk to people about how you feel; people you can trust who will accept you without judgement, such as your friends, parents, teachers and doctor.

Draw round your hand – ask your friends to write something they like about you on each finger/thumb. On the other side write things you like about yourself. Try and fill each side. Keep it to remind yourself.

You can do it illustration

Be your own best friend. Instead of beating yourself up, ask yourself: How would my best friend support me and help me in this situation? Then talk to yourself like your friend would.

Take a look at this TED Talk to find out more about the ‘mysterious workings of the adolescent brain.’

More information

Here's some more useful tips on improving your self-esteem.

What it means to be shy and how to overcome it.

Understand why you feel like you do by understanding your Teenage Brain – Watch a TED talk on the 'mysterious workings of the teenage brain' by Sarah Jayne Blakemore

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